The Tally

Wake up

2 eggs
2 pieces of toast
2 tablespoons of jelly containing high fructose corn syrup (next time you shop note how difficult it is to find one with sugar and NOT HFCS as an additive)
small glass orange juice
_____________________________
danish and coffee
___________________________
2 pieces of bread
3 slices deli cut turkey
1 slice mozarella cheese
small pasta salad
pickle spear
Tablespoon of mayonnaise
3 lettuce leaves
2 small chocolate chip cookies
_________________________________
bag of potato chips and a kit kat bar from office vending machine
________________________________
3 pieces of fried chicken (wing, thigh, leg)
mashed potatoes with gravy
salad
serving of carrots
dinner roll
cole slaw 1/2 cup
small piece of apple pie
________________________
8 0z. glass of milk
4 oreo cookies

Bed time

Where does all this food go? Your body knows not to waste it. It's trained not to waste the calories it has been blessed to have been given. It saves the excess calories that aren't burned. It saves them in the "bank" in case you need them on that rainy day, week, or month that never comes. Is your bank full of deposits?

The Dieters Prayer

Lord, protect me from gluttony and harm,
as you protect me from hunger.

Pray, guide me daily to be filled with your love,
knowing,
that I do not live by bread alone.

As you provide for the birds of the field, and all living things,
I pray provide for me and all mankind.

Hallowed be thy name, Amen

The Slow Burn

To conclude the Brandon and Miles therapy sessions:

What is anger? Is it a negative emotion? Is it something to be ashamed of & banished from your personality? No it isn't. It's part of you just like your capacity to love or befriend and help others is part of you. Anger is an extreme form of confidence and it is NOT inappropriate when the anger is justified. What is an example of justifiable anger? It is what I call the parable of Mr. Jones and here it is:

The shop owner, Mr. Jones, who works hard is robbed one day. He repairs the damage to the window the thief used to enter his store. It is an expensive repair. The police are helpful and supportive but the robber is not caught. Two days later he is robbed again. A little more goods are stolen. The robber breaks the same recently repaired window to gain entry. The thief leaves a note taunting the shop owner and admitting that he is the same robber who struck 2 days before. He has signed the note with the initials TMD
The shop owner repairs the window at his expense, buys replacement goods, and is robbed again 2 days later. In the store Mr. Jones finds another taunting note left by the thief TMD. He tells the shop owner in the handwritten note that he is going to continue robbing him until the owner leaves the neighborhood or goes broke. Each time TMD takes more and more goods from Mr. Jones's shop. This continues for months. TMD keeps robbing Mr. Jones until he is bankrupt. The shopowner never got angry. He just accepted his fate even though he was being exploited and harmed by TMD the thief.

Anger in this case is the normal and understandable response to being harmed by TMD. Every day most of us are harmed by the caloric loading of Three Meals Daily yet we tolerate it. We do get angry but we continue to be robbed of our well-being. We don't know who to blame though because we are doing what we were taught and told. We were told that Everyone should eat at least 3 meals per day. We were also told that smoking was a good method of weight control not so long ago. How did that bit of wisdom work out for us? You have the right to be angry about misinformation when it is harming you. Channel your slow burn anger at the concept that is doing the harm and change it.
Use the slow burn focus of your anger to outwit and overcome the thief who robs you everyday of your ideal weight and health.

What is Miles Talking About?!!?

Brandon was puzzled. Miles, like so many therapists do, was talking in riddles. He was trying to lead Brandon to the answer to weight management by guiding Brandon to it without just handing it to him. He might as well be asking the old, "and how does that make you feel Brandon?" question. On the next visit with Dr. Miles Thompson Brandon told him, "Miles, the only thing I could come up with was "patience" or "determination" or "commitment. Things like that. I know based on our previous conversations that you want me to EXPERIENCE the answers to my problems rather than you just giving me the answer. I have come to understand that and don't disagree. Am I on the right track?"

"Brandon", Dr. Thompson said, "this may surprise you but the emotion you need to utilize is ANGER. I admit this is controversial so I need to explain further. Just like the other emotions this one helps you solve problems and accomplish things in your life. Anger is not always a negative emotion any more than kindness is always a positive emotion when you are being taken advantage of. Most of us refer to Christianity or other religious faith to determine if our behavior is acceptable. Is anger acceptable? Of course it is. Using Christianity as an example, did Jesus Christ ever use anger to resolve a problem? The answer is yes. He used the emotion to right a perceived wrong when he witnessed the Jewish temple being used in a way he didn't approve of. He drove the money changers out of the temple in an act of anger, even to the point of violence! Many modern therapists don't acknowledge that. I do, and believe it is very important! Please think about that Brandon and let's talk about this again.

Brandon left the Doctors office and felt relieved. He wasn't sure exactly why he felt that way but he did. He had never thought about anger being used this way. It was shocking but clearly true. Christ had felt anger and used it in achieving what he perceived as a desirable outcome! How could anyone presume to think that anger is not a useful acceptable part of their personality!

Brandon Takes the Therapy Home

The appointment with Dr. Miles Thompson was over. Brandon was driving away on automatic pilot because he was concentrating so intently on what his therapist had said to him in response to Brandon's last request for help.

This is what Miles told Brandon, "As human beings many emotions drive us Brandon. Ego, Id, Superego, fear, love, jealousy, greed, anger, just to name a few. These emotions or states of mind help us get through life. They help us deal with other people. They help us get what we want and need out of life just like our anatomy helps us get what we need. Everything about us physically and mentally by design helps us succeed. For example hearing and sight help us get what we need out of life. The same is true of emotions. If you see food or you see something frightening you react to it in a way that helps you survive. Emotions work the same way. I want you to leave this appointment today and begin considering what emotions or states of mind can assist you in losing weight and becoming healthy. Those emotions are part of you. They are powerful attributes ready to assist you just as much as your eyesight can lead you to a supersized cheeseburger or away from a very hungry lion. Understanding your emotions and states of mind and using them is how you open the door to the throne room and seize your crown."

He Who Wears the Crown

"Brandon", Miles the therapist said, "five hundred years ago civilized nations were governed by monarchs." " In many countries those monarchs were perceived as god-like, or even god himself. This was true of the Japanese emperor as recently as the 20th century. He or she who wore the crown had absolute power. The same is nearly true of each of us today. If we are in good health and reasonably affluent we have near absolute power regarding our diet. We choose our food kingdom. We choose to make the consumption of food important or unimportant. We choose what, when, where, and how much to eat. We decide whether the consumption of food is secular or non-secular or a combination of both. We choose the contents, size and frequency of our plates sometimes blessed by our God."





Miles continued, "Some of us think very little about this power. In fact, many of us feel just the opposite of what I have just said. Many of us feel enslaved by our appetites and are the dogs being wagged by our tails"





Brandon said, "Miles, I would like to be the monarch regarding my diet. I would like to wear the crown but I feel more like a subject than a king. I feel like I am overpowered and subject to my appetite instead of the other way around. There are times when I literally feel, weak, faint, and I just eat and eat and eat every day and night. I know that is why I am fat. I am not a ruler or monarch. I am a dog being wagged by its tail.


I am going to change that Doctor! Help me change that! Tell me what to do!"

Brandon Gets an Ear Full

After explaining to Miles, his therapist that walking through a grocery store or a mall food court, and watching people devour their supersized portions that one of the emotions he felt was anger , Miles asked Brandon if he had these other feelings as well:


1)betrayal,2) jealousy, & 3)manipulation when others consume a tray of food or for example when the dessert cart comes out at a restaurant. Brandon responded "Yes" to having those feelings from time to time.



Miles explained those feelings to Brandon this way:
"Brandon you are witnessing a very raw power. That is why you have those feelings. Those are your reactions to that power. Food in a real sense is a life and death issue. Deep, very deep in your psyche you know that. When you smell food cooking or witness other people eating food you in fact particapate in the consumption of that other persons food through your senses of sight and smell. The power is so strong that even as civilized and rational as we all are, if we haven't eaten in several hours we may find ourselves salivating though we eat nothing of what we see or smell. So, the truth is without eating the food we can be viscerally effected by it. That Brandon, is TRUE power. When something can effect us and cause a physical reaction through only sight and smell we must rationalize the effect or be overcome by it. For example, we rationalize that although we may be very hungry to the point of salivating, your civilized rational mind prevents you from clubbing the person next to you and taking their food. You rationalize it but you also may be left feeling angry, cheated, & manipulated, left out, etc. Right?

More from our new friends Brandon and Dr. Miles Thompson to follow......